A 'Something' for Today

Almost everyday something crosses my mind to write about.  And almost every day, I find too many other things to get done and don't sit down for myself.  Posting here is one of those therapeutic things I (used to) do regulary, and the last month it has not been there.  July is around the corner and summer should be more of a down time, so once again my blogging is being moved up the priority list-for my own sanity!!

That 'something' that crossed my mind  today (with the help of life situations) came out with a question to my husband. 

"Over the past two to three weeks, what is it that you have appreciated the most from me?" 

Now, I wasn't looking for any 'boost' for myself, any pat on the back.  I simply wanted to know what it was that encouraged, motivated or relaxed G the most.  One of the things I have learned from the Love Dare is to turn my pointed finger toward myself and put my emphsis on others.  Over the past couple years, my focus, my motivation has been quite selfish.  My marriage, my parenting and my relationships all have evidence of it.  One day it could make a REAL good book.  (Maybe I'll follow in my parents footsteps!) 

Anyway ... back to my question.  I truly believe my motivation was to know what was making the largest positive impact on my husband.  I know there are somethings I chose purposely in order to make his life more exciting, or less stressed-fishing day, encouraging words, coffee made.  The funny thing?  His answer was related to something I chose to do in order to make my life less stressed.  I thought that was quite ironic. 

Let me lay it out.  We have a business.  And there are some duties for IPP that I take care of-marketing, books, accounting etc-and I LOVE it!  However, there were a few things within those duties that were causing me extreme stress and took me to the start of panic attacks!  So I decided to step back from those specific things (they weren't urgent) for a period of time, working towards a goal on how to complete them in a healthy manner, at a different time.

And today to my hearts complete surprise, G told me that my stepping back from those things had a roll over effect onto him.  He carries enough stress in making the business work.  He doesn't need me adding to it because of my personal stresses.  I was so blown away.  All the encouraging words, days off to go fishing with a buddy were not the first things he said.  Don't get me wrong.  He mentioned those things later and that those were HUGE for him, but they weren't the most appreciated. 

I guess what I'm realizing is that some of those decisions we make for ourselves, can make a huge impact on those around us.  Specifically our spouses.  So why not ask a loved one the same question today.  See what their response is.  Hopefully they will have something to answer with!!  *grin*  I would love to hear the answers - purposely chosen actions/words, or roll over effects.

Either way, I think life can only get better with any of those answers!