Three years ago, I had a dream.
Okay, so it wasn't a 'dream' as much as it was a desire.
I had voiced that I wanted to set a goal, make some plans and see it come to pass. It was all about family vacation time, fun, affordable and memory-making. Luciano was a year old, and by his 4th summer I wanted to have a camper. Nothing fancy (although I was all over that if it was possible! You know, the truck, the fifth wheel that included the washer and dryer too!), but something that enabled the memories and family time that came with mini or not-so-mini, affordable vacations.
Unfortunately, Gino and I are wired differently. Goal setting and individual plans/steps marked on a calendar set to accomplish the goal, are not as important or pressing for him as they are for me. So needless to say, this Spring did not include Saturday mornings at the RV distributor, or Scotiabank to finance a camper. Instead, the topic reared its ugly head in our therapy sessions (which is fantastic, really ... fan.tas.tic! *eyebrow lift, rolling eyes*).
So this past few weeks, after spending some time reflecting on how to make our differences work for us instead of against us, (man it's stinky being an adult) I let it go. If you know me just an ounce, 'letting it go' ain't all that easy. When I feel pressed for something, passionate about something, or just plain determined about something, I am challenged with not communicating everything that goes through my brain about that said topic. But I have shut up about it, REALLY shut-up about it!!!
Today, my phone rang. I answered. I listened. I spoke. I hang-up. I ran upstairs crying.
My desire, my unmet goal had been reached.
Dear friends of ours offered us their camper FOR FREE if we were interested. I ran upstairs crying.
Sovereignty.
Some of you have walked close enough with me over the past 5 years to know that life in its basic-ness (is that even a word Alex!? Geez!) has been very challenging, nevermind it’s non-basic-ness! And yet today, despite the hard road, the right/wrong choices or difficult circumstances, my desire was met.
Sovereignty.
Really? Is there anymore to say? Life stinks at times. Life rocks at times. And sometimes life just takes you by surprise and gives you hope, the sense of a springboard that propels you forward.
I will forever be grateful that despite my failures (and successful attempts for that matter), God still sees it in His sovereignty to meet my hearts desires.
Do what the LORD wants, and He will give you your heart's desire (Psalm 37:4 CEV)
Keep company with GOD, get in on the best. (Psalm 37:4 MSG)
So my final important question for you to ponder ...
.
.
.
.
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Anyone wanna go camping!?
2 comments:
I love ya Alex! You are always so open and honest in the lessons God has given you to learn, and through them I learn just a little bit too! :)
I've noticed that too... that as soon as I give up what I want, God gives it back to me with way more joy and blessing than if I had gotten it my way. The hard part is to remember that each time something has to go, and that really letting go means that God doesn't have to give it back (because then it wasn't really let go of in the first place). But when He does, it's so great!
Very happy you got your camper, Alex. That is AWESOME!!
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